Waiting in the silence and the fire

8:13 PM

You haven't heard from me because I have not been writing. I mean, I've taken some notes, whipped off some journal entries, and kept my style blog from disappearing into the crevasse of no return, but I haven't really been writing.

I'm in school, 30 hours a week, training to be a professional cosmetologist. And then I nanny another 13 or so. And then I come home and do homework, and prep meals and clothes and sometimes assignments for the next day. Every evening.

Weekends? Laundry and more homework.

This is my life right now, and it's been wearing me out a bit.

So I've had to accept the fact that for this season, I really can't write; not consistently. And I have so much I want to write about. So many ideas, stories to be told, and maybe songs or bits of poetry. I've made some notes, recorded some good ideas, but at this point I just have to sit on most of it and wait.

It's lit a fire under me.

There's nothing like a little (or a lot) of time away from something to help you look at it and see what it really means to you. Having to distance myself from writing has allowed me to understand it more clearly, and decide what I want my writing future and the new career path I'm pursuing to look like. (Although I know there's only so much I can plan that sort of thing.)

I am a writer. I can not wait to get back to it; all the blood, sweat and tears. It's something I am meant to do.

But for now, I wait.

-Amanda

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